so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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