Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
