You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
