Can Purell be used as lube?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
