My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
