Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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