Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
