I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
