Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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