You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
