I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
