What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I cut my penus on the lid.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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