What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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