That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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