Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
