What did we do last night that was yellow?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
