As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
