Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
