Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
