so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
