Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
we should paint friendship bongs
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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