I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
