he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
