Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
