Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
