The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
