'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Randomize
