I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Boobs are out for the taking
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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