hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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