If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
