If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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