just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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