You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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