Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
