he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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