i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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