My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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