the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
