She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
handjob tips. give me some.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
