Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
