I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
