Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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