It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
