From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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