remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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