He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
