I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
