That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
one two three fourrrrnication!
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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