is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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