I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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